piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
