it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
