there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
