and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
