if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
