i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
