bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
