i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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