i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
