somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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