if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
