so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It all started with a game of naked twister.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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