Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
