i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Life is so much better after having sex.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
