dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
