It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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