it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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