Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
