He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
