I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize