Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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