I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
