i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
