is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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