if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
