You're completely useless in the revolution.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize