THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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