used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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