So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
