She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
