she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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