I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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