Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Quick, to the slutcave!
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize