So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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