just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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