the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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