My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Blood and glitter go together right?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize