"it" just moved
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
