When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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