Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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