I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Who died my cat blue again?
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