Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
