That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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