It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
