It's like a parade of train wrecks.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
