Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
