You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
