his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
