Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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