Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
sarcasm needs its own font
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
