I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
